I love reading….my children love hearing me read to them and it’s funny, my husband enjoys hearing me read.
As a child, I did not enjoy reading. Although, I won an award in first grade for being among the top five readers in my class (for quantity…not quality, mind you), I did not enjoy it. I read…because I had to.
Now, I read because I’m finally falling in love with learning and understanding the beauty behind the wisdom of reading.
Most of all, I am truly loving my Bible time. Sitting and reading….hearing the words in my heart and truly understanding that it’s not just a ‘story’…a made up, idea of something that never happened, promising something that never will happen.
It’s a beautiful love HIStory…a story from my Father, passed down through generations, raising up strong hearts for His glory….to truly understand the depth and beauty of His love, grace and mercy.
As a Mom, I want that for my children. Oh, how my heart years for them to truly DESIRE to read the Bible. Not to read it because they have to. Not to memorize it because I assign a scripture, but for their hearts to truly grab hold of it.
Over the past few months, I have been reading 7 Tools for Cultivating Your Child’s Potential and Full-Time Parenting: A Guide to Family-Based Discipleship…..both have truly helped me take a step back as a parent and realize, I’ve been trying to do the work of the Holy Spirit.
WHAT? Who does that?
Well,this Mama with a heart that was hurt early in life…through the action of others and through my own sinful heart…. My desire was truly not to do the work of the Holy Spirit, but to be a good Mama…teach my children RIGHT and keep them from enduring the heart hurts I have endured…through learning early about the Holy Spirit.
What I missed in that is this…..
As a parent, I have a grand commission from my Father… To disciple my children daily. I am to teach them His word through reading it and living it.
Pause – that is a hard role to keep for a Mama who never saw it or heard it growing up….I am truly just now growing up in the Lord and feel like I’m on this treadmill or even hamster wheel running with all of my might to get two steps ahead of them and share with them His love…to save them (um, do you see…there’s the problem again….keep reading)
So…through my reading it and living it…I felt it was my job to convict them.
My job is to Love them.
Oh, I think my heart is getting it…this being a child of God and parent to three of His children, while also being a wife first and friend…the list goes on, I’m sure you have the same one.
My job…as a parent is to LOVE HIM first. By doing that, I share HIS grace and mercy with my littles.
Those little ones, running around, causing all kinds of mischief, but always, always desiring open arms from a Mama, who all too often had those hugs withdrawn during times of heart growth.
Oh, the pain can go deep….but, I keep handing it over and the more I do, the more I walk into HIS arms…and my own open even wider to embrace the sweetness of their hearts and show them, truly show them….me,….I’m their Mama.
I’m going to love them no matter what.
Here…here is where grace and mercy collide…and we can sit together at the Father’s feet…loving and confessing…
and me, I can relax a little knowing…the Holy Spirit will convict and cause heart change.
My littles don’t need to find mercy and grace in what they do…after all, we are not saved by that….we are saved by faith and through that faith, we grow love that leads us to the doing…not to be saved, but to fulfill the final commission of loving and making disciples of all nations.
Like the Trinity…that beautiful three in one, we are wrapped in a beautiful circle….it’s a circle that never ends, but one day will take us to that life of eternal…
I’m sharing this today….because over these months…as I’ve read to me…I’ve read to my children. We just finished Teddy’s Button. This sweet boy….whose life was wrapped up in this button, this mischievous boy whose hands and words cause heart hurts for some…..yet…His Mama understood the grace and mercy. She understood the power of the Holy Spirit. She understood her job and wrapped her arms around those curls that caused mischief and those arms…took that sweet little boy to a place of understanding his role as a soldier in his captain’s army….
That’s what I want….
Will you join me in that?
This is where we are in our home…my children reading with me in the Bible, sitting with me at the throne…loving on this mama…and this mama loving on them as we seek the beauty and glory only found at the feet…of the cross!
Blessings to you!
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